on moving on

I’m a free-spirited gypsy – in theory. I’m always dreaming about moving around, living the nomad life and exploring new territory, new cultures, new art exhibitions, new flavors, and new places. However, I also love feeling at home. Decorating a space, making it cozy, making it my home and feeling comfortable in my city, in my neighborhood. The idea of actually calling a place “my city” seems as dreamy to me as traveling all over the world full time.

So what do you when you’re somewhere in-between? When you’re craving a constant home but also longing for new experiences? Well, you are kind of stuck in the middle. And that’s ok too. However, for the past two years, I had this desire to leave Munich behind. The last couple year, I really loved living in Munich and Munich treated me well.

Munich and I have a complicated yet truly romantic relationship. I’ve chosen this city the way I make most of my decisions: straight on with my heart. I’ve been dreaming about living here for a while and it did not disappoint. After moving to my beautiful shoebox flat in the heart of Schwabing and beginning my studies at Ludwig-Maximilians-University, everything was perfect and I started to think that one day I might be settling down here for real. They say once you move to Munich you’ll never leave. But if I am being honest, even back then I had this desire for more.

It is comparable to the perfect boyfriend, who loves you so very much and who treats you like a true princess… but in the end, it doesn’t really matter. You can play it safe and stay with them and probably have a great life. It just won’t fulfill you, because you’re craving passion. And you just want more. it’s is unfair to you and that poor guy to stay, so if you ever find yourself in this sort of situation do yourself the favor and let go.

I was too weak to break up with Munich about two years ago, even though I kind of knew even back that our time was up. So I played it safe, sublet my place and moved to Paris for a bit. The thing is I did not not love Munich. Or maybe, it wasn’t love in the first place – it was more of an idea of love. It was my comfortable routine.

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

Seneca

As Seneca said: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” — sometimes we need to close a door (even if it is a pretty and amazing door) to open a new one. So here I am, sitting on the floor of an almost empty flat – ready to leave and move on.

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